Okay, seems lots of you #Empire watchers were confused by tonight’s episode, so allow me to Recap for you…
This episode opened with Becky getting some good loving with Gutter Life rapper J. Poppa. I bet Becky’s got some tricks the way she cocked that leg up.
No, you did not miss an episode… Hakeem went through the quickest kidnapping in television history. I mean, they didn’t even have time to pick up the Missing fliers from Kinkos. He was snatched, ransom paid, the end. Oh, except for when the kidnappers let him go and he wandered into Boo Boo Kitty’s bed because yeah, you know, after you’ve been kidnapped the first thing you want to do is have sex with your almost step-mama.
Jamal was mad because he keeps being marketing as a gay artist because while “he’s gay and he’s an artist, he aint no gay artist.” (Did anyone else scratch their head on that one?).
Hakeem tried to perform with 3L-Latinas. He started bumping into everyone as it appeared he was suffering from what my friend Michelle Mitchell calls PTKS (part time kidnapping syndrome). But don’t fret. If you went to refill your wine, by the time you came back, he was cured! (And his eye healed in record time!) Poor Boo Boo Kitty…she gave him some kitty consolation and in true 22 year old form, he didn’t call her again.
How you gonna run a label called Gutter Life quoting Bible scriptures? Well, that’s exactly what Andre did. In fact, he convinced Becky’s boo, J. Poppa to incorporate God into his hood rap. That didn’t best online casino go over too well with Lucious. But he felt redeemed when Thug-Tasia took the stage, until she kicked a heckler in the face, then took off running. Andre called her a liability and told Lucious he put him in charge, to which Daddy Dearest quickly reminded Dre that he put him in place, not in charge. Lucious is intent on reining that gangsta in and went to the hood to get her…and give her the Soda Pop song he originally tried to give to Hakeem. He has some affinity for Thug-Tasia (probably because he had her daddy killed, but I digress)
Cookie went to try and make a deal with the kidnappers to get them to leave the Lyon’s clan alone and Hakeem pulled a gun and played tough guy. Unfortunately, he failed because it seemed like he was holding a water pistol. Of course, Mama had to show him how it was done.
Cookie FINALLY got over Lucious to get her some loving and she turned to Max (Adam Rodriguez). And after uttering the romantic “So we gon’ do this or what” phrase to him, he took her right there on the table….and we saw the same bull tattoo on his back that the kidnappers had. Yep, Cookie is getting got – and not just on the table. Boy, can you imagine her wrath when she finds that out…(Tell the truth, how many of y”all got mad about Adam being a bad guy)?
What were your thoughts on this episode? Will you be back next week?
PS – Things I never need to hear again…Becky talking about a rod hitting her walls. Like ever. In this life or the after life.
PPS – Boom, boom, boom, boom, bang, bang, bang, bang…Really??? Just when I got “Drip, drop” out of my head, here’s another soda pop rap that I’ll be unwittingly singing all night. I’m gonna go listen to Ice Cube or Tupac to try and get that rap drivel out my head.
PPPS – Ummm – Commerical break: Cant wait to see Creed. That Michael B. Jordan is fine…I could be his BooBoo Kitty…too bad Im old enough to be his…aunt…oh, and I’m married…